Missing In Action
So, it has been quite crazy the past few weeks. I apologize for missing in action. I had hurt myself at work (my right hand; two fingers) and it made it really, really, hard to type with all the bandaging and with final papers due for school. Most of my free time was pecking away at the keyboard one key at a time. However, fingers are healed(ing) and currently I am done with school for the next 3 weeks!
As I try and settle in for a few weeks off school and spend some much-needed time with my family, I am starting to reflect on the past few weeks. I have to say, as I look back, I am quite embarrassed on how I acted or perhaps, I should say “reacted”. I have always been that guy to move and do at 200%. As I was one handed for a few weeks you can imagine how impossible that would have become. Between my responsibilities of school and work, I grew more and more frustrated, short tempered, and just over all angry with the whole situation. I would never have thought two lacerations would be able to put that much strain on so much around me or that the stress of it all would have had me “missing in action”. I was reacting to a situation very selfishly and immaturely. An attitude that did not reflect Christ.
“As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” Ephesians 4:1-3
Now, one evening an amazing thing had happened. Eliana, my 5-year-old, climbed up onto my lap. We sat there both just watching T.V. for a few minutes, staring off in a vegetated state, or at least I was. Ellie, with out even turning to look at me said, “Dad, why are you so grumpy today? Is it because I didn’t clean my room?” I instantly teared up. She turns to me and sees these giant-sized tear drops pooling up in the corner of my eyes. “Dad, are you sad or are your fingers still owie? Sometimes when I get an owie I cry too.” I told her both, that “I am sad that I have been grumpy to you and that my fingers were still pretty owie.” With Ellie on my lap we prayed for healing that night.
Some tough love:
Even as the man of the house there are many times situations are bigger than us. Even if they seem small at first, they can become a thorn in our side. Our, “We got this!” mentality does nothing but fuel our pride and drop a wedge between that which is important. As a man, as a father, and as a husband I should have hit my knees the first sign of trouble asking for help with my attitude and my fingers. We have a responsibility to walk a life worthy of our calling and to teach our families what is important. Let our families see us asking for help, asking for forgiveness, and having emotions. Let our families see God is real in our lives and the power He has to comfort. Let our families see his healing, mercy, and grace through His love. Your family watches you, let them see how real God is in your life not just in word.
Last night after getting home from work I sat on the couch to watch a little T.V. Eliana attempted to climb up on my lap and was halted by a big scrape on my leg. “Wowzers dad! Another owie.” She looked up at me with her big blue eyes and without a second thought and even with excitement then said, “Dad can I pray for it!”
Love this 💜 Thank you for your heart and humility. I too find so often that stress and anxiety are such triggers for me to “reacting” instead of taking what I can’t control to the feet of Jesus and exchange it for peace and grace.